I don't think Easton's teachers started out with ignoring his crying...but today Mrs. M said that giving his crying any attention wasn't helping either. So they said they found it better by trying to ignore it.
I don't blame them because, seriously, they have a whole class there being normal. They didn't ignore Easton...just the crying. So, he's still really really wanting to climb up into that reading loft...but Mrs. M told him that she can't have anybody crying if someone's up there. He still didn't stop, though.
It is really really hard to not know what set him off in particular, if anything. I mean, he was fine when I left. So what happens? That's where this has been so hard to let go. I hate that no one is playing with him. I hate that he doesn't think PRESCHOOL is fun.
Easton is not communicating well with us at all about this. He's not telling the whole truth when we ask about it (claiming school was fun, saying he was swinging, etc). He acted like a baby for much of the day speaking a bunch of gibberish when Jason was asking him about his day or just giving one word answers in his baby voice. In fact, when I picked him up at school he began by crawling towards me till I motioned for him to stand up.
If I thought babying him when he was crying would help then I'd want his teachers to do that. However, even though he's my kid I still don't get all sappy over his tears. Like with art class, me cradling him and catering to his tears would only serve to make him want to cry more, if you ask me. Like he wouldn't be any braver the next time...if he wanted his mama then he'd do all those things in order to get his mama.
So while it breaks my heart especially to think of the other kids ignoring him, I also understand what his teachers are trying to do. They're just trying to carry on and hope that he'll see what fun they're having and come around, I guess. I guess I would like to see them help him with fitting in a little more...finding pals or activities to help him take his mind off missing me.
Again, with his art class I'd stay in there until the kids started having fun...then I could leave without him missing me. I sort of want for them to help him find the fun for now.
But she's the one with all the experience, too.
See?
See how this is hard?
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Just Want to Clarify...
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4 comments:
Many hugs! This is just a phase. It is like they know they need to be big kids but acting like a baby is easier. Lance is doing the same thing and this is his 3rd year at the same preschool. Garrett went through this also. And when Easton gets closer to 4 you will see a huge maturity difference. For some reason before every big maturity milestone or jump there is a little bit of regression.
Now the teacher in me says: don't linger, drop him off and leave, it will get better. He does have a good time and he is fine. And as sad as it makes you feel, it is ok for him to be sad. (I know that it hurts!) It is another one of those hard life lessons. I don't think he is worried that you aren't coming back, just that he doesn't want to have fun without you.
I hope I didn't sound to preachy. I am just going through the same thing.
Oh friend! Just checking in to see how preschool is going and I just have to laugh a little 'knowing' kind of laugh because our boys are so much alike this week!! Luke is struggling with this second week of school too, after an AWESOME first one! Sounds like our kiddo's 'issues' a bit different, but struggles (no matter what they are) are rough! Hang in there....everyone at school keeps telling me that it will get better in a week or two (or three!) LOL! School is supposed to be good for them, right?! Why is it so tough for us Mommy's?????
Kids this age often tell you what they WISHED had happened, rather than the truth. So E says he had fun and he was swinging, because that's what he wanted to happen. Maybe it would help him if the two of you made a To Do List before school each day, of things for him to try and do. Maybe goals would help him focus on something other than you? Then you could come home and do stickers or a reward program for all the things he did?
I don't know. I know this is rough on you and I'm so sorry, K.
Hey- If I were her I would try to engage him in a number of different things to get him "happy"- an art project...something with water...or better yet a small group activity. Does Easton like her? I wander if he could be her "partner/helper" for a while? britty
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